Recently, I came across a story of a woman who married her ‘soul mate’. What’s the big deal? Her ‘soul mate’ was a ghost. To be precise, she is now wife to the ghost of a pirate from the 18th century, who looks like Johnny Depp’s Jack Sparrow character from Pirates of the Caribbean. According to the 45-year-old Irish woman, her boyfriend proposed. And there is more, their relationship isn’t platonic.
When I first read the headlines, my reaction was, “You go girl!”. Ok yes, she is weird, and her story is crazy. Yet, I feel for this woman and almost strangely understands her need for this love-story. Her desperation for ‘that man’ who gets her completely is a common longing. The truth is, all of us have that idea of a perfect man or woman in our heads. We fantasize and wish (mostly in secret) to find them ‘the soul mate’ someday. Amanda Teague just took an extreme step and married hers.
Her story amuses me more because she had previously been married and has five children. How can a mother to five children not lose it? I have lots of questions about the ex too. And I don’t know what to think of the kids having a ghost for a stepfather. But then, I think they should be better off in many ways just like their mom. I am such a hopeless romantic that I don’t want her to wake up from this dream. She should but I don’t want her to.
This fairytale is too incredible and unnatural but also a very real representation of relationships in the present day. Married or not, our lack of patience to tolerate contradictory personalities and the clarity that we deserve better, are only driving us closer to our Johnny Depps and the Scarlett Johanssons. Amanda defended her marriage saying that she wasn’t the only living person having a supernatural relationship and that there were other people in similar relationships.
At another time, while watching a television talk show, the host said that in 10 years, if he remained unmarried, he will marry himself. He said he will have a ceremony followed by a fabulous party. Sounds good to me. Why not, right? I feel like many such stories of somebody marrying a ghost via a medium or marrying oneself will soon become a common event.
Wholly aware of the possibilities of having remained unmarried, I asked my husband what kind of spinster he thought I would be. “A bitter one.” he replied, and I knew that I didn’t have a weapon to oppose his judgement. The truth is that after 6 years, I still can’t believe that I ended up married. I gave it a go with the only man I could realistically think of having around me and also, the only man I knew could endure me (my definition of a soul mate). It was a risky leap, but I’m grateful that it worked out for me. Had it not, I can very easily see myself walking down the aisle to marry not a ghost, but myself.